Illumination
by coldfusion9797
Summary: Follows on from Outside. Ash has a thing for Kyle but Kyle is totally clueless. Will Ash ever be able to get Kyle to notice him in the way he wants? Ash/Kyle.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This follows on directly from the oneshot I wrote called 'Outside'. It has the potential to be a chapter fic, guess I'll just have to see how it goes…**

Kyle watched Ash storm off, hoping that his message had gotten through. Denny didn't need blokes hassling her this soon after Casey.

Now that Case was gone it had fallen to him and Brax to look out for her, and Kyle was determined to do it right, he owed his brother that much.

"Kyle Braxton!" Crap, Denny didn't sound too happy, she didn't look it either. And considering the purposeful way she was marching towards him maybe she didn't need looking out for after all...

She came to a halt in front of him, determination on her face. "You're a bloody fool, you know that?"

"What?"

"Ash isn't interested in me, we're just friends." Ash had said the same thing but Kyle found it hard to believe.

"Seriously Denny? You can't be that naïve. A guy like him? There's only one thing he's after..."

"Oh my God Kyle! Do you even know how many things are wrong with what you just said?"

"Enlighten me." If there was more to Ash than cool boots and even cooler hair, Kyle couldn't see it. Sure, he was a capable employee who was popular with the customers but Kyle doubted his thoughts went beyond his next ride, whether that be bikes, waves or chicks.

"For one thing I know for a fact he's not interested in me..."

"Oh yeah? How's that?"

"Because he likes someone else. That's what we were talking about before you butted in. Secondly, it's none of your business who I see. If I-"

"Don't you think it's bit soon?" Kyle cut in, he couldn't believe she was already thinking of moving on. "Did he mean that little to you?" Denny's cheeks flushed with colour and her eyes blazed. Shit, he'd gone too far.

"Don't you dare question my love for Casey! A piece of me died that day! But I also know he wouldn't want me to give up. He'd want me to move on and when I'm ready I will."

"Sorry." God, he was making a complete mess of this.

"So you should be, but this isn't even about me. It's about Ash and I think you owe him an apology too." She fixed him with a glowering look until he gave in.

"Fine. I'll tell him I'm sorry."

"Good. And while you're at it you might wanna take the time to see what's staring you in the face." Kyle had no idea what that meant but he'd make the apology anyway. He'd do it for the simple reason that right now Denny was scaring the shit out of him and he didn't wanna give her any more cause to yell at him.

xxx

"I'll get this order to the kitchen for you right away ladies." Ash added a smile and a wink to his words, it was a small amount of effort for the tip that would follow. He could add considerably to his pay cheque by turning on this little bit of charm. He turned away from the table to see Kyle watching him, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. One thing Ash did know about Kyle was that he needed to lighten up. Though he did wonder if Kyle had always been so gloomy or if circumstance had made him this way. Either way, he'd like the chance to find out.

"Hang around when you're done, I need to talk to you." Okay, that didn't sound good. Kyle wouldn't seriously fire him for hanging out with Denny, would he? Ash liked this job. He nodded and headed for the kitchen. As he walked through the door, he became aware of someone following him and turned to see it was Kyle.

"It's nothing bad," his employer offered, "just something we need to sort out." Ash couldn't stand it, why was Kyle being all cloak and dagger about this? Why didn't he just say whatever it was?

"Can't we just sort it now?"

"Umm, I guess," Kyle shrugged uncomfortably, "I just wanted to apologise for having a go at you about Denny."

"That's it?"

"Umm, yeah? What else do you want me to say?"

"No, nothing," Ash shook his head, "I just wasn't sure I'd be good enough to work here, you seem to think I'm not fit for Denny..." Ash meant for that to be cutting, but the way it came out just made him sound kind of sad. A look of shock played across Kyle's face, followed by one of shame.

"I'm sorry about that too, it's nothing personal."

"How can that not be personal?" But Ash realised exactly how the second the words were out his mouth.

"Casey..." they said in unison. The name hung between them, Ash hadn't known Casey but it almost felt as though he had, his presence lingered so strongly around all those who had known him. He must have been an incredible person to leave such an impression. Kyle sighed, and Ash sensed that he'd dropped his guard just a little.

"No one can ever take his place," Ash observed. In himself he felt better because to Kyle this had nothing to do with him and was based on loyalty to his brother, but now he wanted to comfort Kyle, he just wasn't sure how. Alleviating his concerns was the best Ash could do. "I promise you I'm not trying to, Denny's a friend, that's all."

"Yeah, I know," Kyle admitted, at least that was a start.


	2. Chapter 2

"So you know that brooding muso I've got a thing for?" Ash asked Denny.

"Yeah..."

"Well he apologised to me."

"Did he just..."

"Yeah. You wouldn't know anything about that?"

"Na," she grinned, proving once again how cool she was.

"Well if you did, I'd say thanks."

"And if I did, I'd say you're welcome."

"And I guess I should follow suit. I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier."

"Forget it," she dismissed, "love has a tendency to-"

"Whoa! Slow down there Miller. No one said anything about love. It's just a thing..."

"Sorry, you're right. I fell so hard and fast for Case I can't think of attraction any other way." Ash wasn't sure what to say, he knew Denny wasn't fishing for sympathy, she was just stating a fact. So he should treat it as one.

"You were lucky to have that Den."

"I know," she smiled, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. "So..." she continued, guiding them to a lighter subject. He let it go, not wanting to upset her any more. "What's the plan from here?"

"Plan? There is no plan..."

"Well then clearly we need one."

"We?"

"Yeah we. So, we need to decide how to play this. Do we tell him you're gay and see how he reacts to that? Or do we work on building a friendship and go from there?"

"Are we really doing this?"

"Yes." Ash suspected Denny was using this as a distraction, but he couldn't hold it against her. He couldn't imagine how hard her loss was to deal with.

"Then I vote we go with the friendship one. Who knows? I might not even like him once I get to know him properly."

"That's a terrible attitude Ashford. Besides, it's just nerves speaking."

"Am I that obvious?" he wondered. He'd never felt quite like this before. Nerves were something he'd never really had to deal with.

"To me? Yes. I doubt you've ever had trouble pulling before..."

"You're not wrong," he admitted. And there was something else. Some fact that was eluding him but would change things when he figured it out. For now though he'd just focus on this friendship thing.

xxx

Kyle had to admit Denny was right. There was more to Ash than he'd had given him credit for, underneath his roguish exterior there seemed to be a thoughtful and clever person. He'd been perceptive enough to figure out this was about Casey, not him, and Kyle felt bad for judging him so quickly. From now on he'd give Ash the benefit of the doubt until he saw something that told him otherwise.

On that note he decided to try again with getting to know the bloke.

"You guys wanna hang around after closing for a drink?" Denny shot Ash a look leaving the decision to him. Ash hesitated.

"On the house," Kyle encouraged, waving a bottle of vodka at them. Ash still didn't look sure, but Denny took it upon herself to step up for both of them.

"Well when you put it like that..."


	3. Chapter 3

Several drinks later the atmosphere had lightened and they sat around the table making small talk. They hadn't closed up 'til late tonight so it was after midnight.

"Does this remind you of being a teenager?" Kyle asked. "When you'd stay up all night talking and playing truth or dare?"

"Yeah kinda, minus the alcohol of course," Denny said, throwing another shot down.

"Not me," Ash said, "I've been on the turps since I was fourteen. I used to take my grandma to the bottle-o to get booze for me and my mates."

"You did not!" Denny admonished.

"Yeah I did, she adored me, she was happy to do it."

"I always picked truth," Denny said, "that way it was only my friends I'd be in trouble with."

"I was a dare man," Ash said, "happy to do anything as long I didn't have to reveal any secrets. Dares are over and done with but those truths can last forever."

"What were you hiding?" Kyle chimed in.

"What?"

"The secrets. What was so secret you couldn't tell your friends?"

"I don't even remember now," Ash lied.

"Was it about your secret crush?' Kyle pressed, "some girl you were worried wouldn't like you back?"

"Look at me. You think I'd need to keep it secret?"

"I'll bet it was. Denny said you've got one now."

"I never said that," Denny defended.

"You said you know for a fact he likes someone..."

"That doesn't mean it's a secret," she squirmed.

"So who is it then?"

"Doesn't matter," Ash said, brushing the question aside.

"Ah-hah! See? You're doing it right now." Ash rolled his eyes.

"I don't have to tell you anything."

"Not yet. Let's play. Truth or dare?"

"Seriously?" Ash challenged, heat creeping into his voice. "Anyway, how dumb do you think I am? Why would I pick truth now when you're obviously trying to get information out of me?"

"It's your idea Kyle," Denny stepped in, "you go first. Truth or dare?"

"Alright, fine. Dare."

"Okay, let's see..." Denny pondered. "Okay. I dare you to kiss one of us." She grinned at him, Kyle didn't grin back.

"Seriously? What are you? Fifteen?"

"Maybe, but at least I'm not chicken."

"Fine." Suddenly Kyle leaned across and popped a kiss on Ash's cheek. "There. Happy?"

"That's how you kiss your grandma," Denny laughed.

"So? You said a kiss. And that's a kiss. You shoulda been more specific if you wanted more than that. Or maybe you're just jealous?" Now it was Kyle's turn to grin.

"In your dreams Braxton."

"Okay, you next," Kyle said to her, "truth or dare?"

"Dare?"

"Oooo, stepping out of the comfort zone huh Denise?" Denny shrugged. "Okay, I dare you to tell me who Ash likes?"

"You can't do that!" Denny protested, and was rescued from an argument by an interruption.

"Hey guys."

"Oh hey Andy," Denny answered, "what are you doing up here?"

"I heard noises so I thought I'd come check it out. You guys having a party?"

"Kind of, wanna join us?" Ash asked.

"We've got booze, my shout..." Kyle offered.

"Well when you put it like that," Andy accepted. He pulled up a seat between Denny and Kyle.

"What are you still doing here this late?" Ash asked the gym manager. He'd given Andy a hard time when he'd first arrived in town but he actually kinda liked the bloke now. Not that he'd tell him that, stirring Andy up was way too much fun.

"I was going over the books, I want to make sure everything is on track for Brax."

"Hey," Denny said, "did you guys ever play SEVOL?"

"No..." they all told her.

"Well you've been missing out. Who's got some paper?" Ash produced his order pad and pen. "Right. Let's do me and you Kyle, just so I can show you how it works." On the paper Denny wrote her full name followed by the letters S, E, V, O and L and then Kyle's name. "It's a love test. SEVOL is just 'loves' spelled backwards. So you count up each of the five letters... so there's one S in both our names..." she wrote a 1, "four E's, no V's, one O and 3 L's." On the paper she'd written 14013. "Now you add the numbers next to each other..." on the next line she wrote 5414, "and you keep doing that until you get a percentage." The number she came up with was 16. "Sixteen percent, looks like we won't work Kyle."

"You're breaking my heart here Den," Kyle joked.

"Do another one," Ash said, "you and Andy." She shot him a conspicuous look but complied. She went through the process again. "Ninety-four percent," she frowned.

"That's all but a guarantee," Ash appreciated, giving her a wink.

"I've had enough of this game, it's dumb anyway," Denny declared.

"One more," Kyle insisted, "you and Ash."

"How 'bout _you_ and Ash," Denny shot back. She ignored his protests and began the process. "Kyle Braxton SEVOL..." Denny lapsed into silence as she wrote Ash's name. She curled her arm around the paper to hide what she'd written. "Sixty-eight percent. Really could go either way."

"What does that number even mean?" Kyle questioned. "Is it how much they love you? Or a compatibility rating?"

"I dunno," Denny shrugged, "it's just something to giggle about when you're fourteen and get eighty-six percent with the cute boy in class you have a crush on."

"You suck at picking games Miller," Ash decided. "How 'bout we play a drinking game? 'Never Have I Ever...' is a good one."

"I'll start," Kyle offered. "Never have I ever been to prison." Ash and Andy lifted their glasses and drank. Andy went next, glancing at Denny before he spoke.

"Never have I ever worn my hair in a ponytail." Ash rolled his eyes at Andy's obvious attempt to get Denny drunk, before swallowing a mouthful of alcohol himself.

"Never have I ever been arrested," Denny said.

"We've already had that one," Ash protested.

"No, we haven't," Denny countered, pointing his attention towards Kyle who was drinking.

"You? Seriously?" Ash found it hard to believe, Kyle was so down the line with everything he did. "What'd you do? Jaywalk?"

"I was charged with kidnapping actually."

"But you were innocent?" Ash asked, trying to reconcile the man he knew with this new information.

"No, I did it. It woulda been a murder charge if I'd had my way."

"Okay," Ash said. "Start from the start. I don't believe you'd ever do something like that."

"You barely know me," Kyle scoffed, "I was in a dark place then and I wanted revenge. I was gonna kill the bloke that killed my Dad."

"What happened? What stopped you?"

"Brax stopped me. It was Casey. I kidnapped Casey and tried to kill him. I'd've gone down for it too if Brax hadn't convinced Case to drop the charges. We mighta met under very different circumstances." That thought scared Ash, he couldn't imagine Kyle having to deal with life inside. Not that he exactly thought Kyle couldn't handle it, it's just that he knew how shitty it was in lock up and he didn't want anyone he cared about to go through that.

"Never have I ever been infatuated to distraction and not made a move." Ash didn't see what the others did, he was too focused on his own glass that he held raised in front of his face. Did he drink or not? Was that what this thing with Kyle was? Why didn't he make a move? Was it because this was Brax's brother? Or could he make that move now? What was the worst that could happen?

"Never have I ever been surfing," Kyle said, interrupting Ash's thoughts. Ash drank and then realised what Kyle had just said.

"You're a Braxton and you live at the beach."

"Did you miss the part where I'm a late edition to this family? I tried to kill them, remember?" Kyle was just full of surprises.

"Never have I ever kissed a bloke," Andy said, apparently still on his mission to make Denny consume as much vodka as possible. He had no idea about the awkward position he'd just put Ash in. Ah, fuck it. Who cared? Ash threw his head back and finished his drink.

"Never have I ever kissed a girl," Denny countered quickly, hoping to distract Kyle from asking the obvious question. She was the only one who didn't drink.

"Never have I ever been in love," Ash said. Immediately Denny downed the rest of her drink. Andy didn't touch his glass. But that was in Ash's periphery. His gaze was fixed intently on the captivating man beside him.

"I don't know."

"If you don't know you haven't been," Denny said, and so Kyle didn't drink. He still looked conflicted about the decision though. Denny started scribbling on the notepad again.

"Wow. You guys are morbid drunks," Andy observed. Denny ripped a page off the notepad, scrunched it up and threw it at Andy's face.

"You're right," she said, "and it's getting late."

"C'mon then, I'll take you home," he offered. It was the best idea, Andy'd definitely had the least to drink, she'd be safest with him driving. They all stood up. Ash pulled Denny into a hug.

"See you tomorrow chickie." She said goodbye and followed Andy out the door. Ash looked around at the mess as he turned to Kyle. "I'll help you clean up."


	4. Chapter 4

There really wasn't that much to tidy up. A few glasses, a few empty bottles... Ash bent down to pick up the ball of paper Denny'd thrown at Andy.

"Hey…" Kyle began, Ash shoved the paper in his pocket and turned to his boss who sounded like he had something on his mind. "When Andy said that guy kiss thing, you finished your drink..."

"Is there a question in there?" Ash enquired, he wasn't gonna spill if Kyle didn't have the balls to ask.

"Was it in prison?" Ash couldn't believe Kyle had just said that. He noted that alcohol obviously made the bloke say the stupidest things imaginable.

"Okay, wherever that train of thought is going, stop it there. It's definitely a good thing you didn't end up inside. And no more vodka for you ever..." Kyle did have the decency to look embarrassed.

"Sorry..." he mumbled.

"Right. Is this place sorted?" Ash asked, changing the subject and ready to get the hell outta here.

"Yep, looks like," Kyle consented. Ash led the way downstairs and out into the night. There was a strong breeze blowing up from the beach. The rush of fresh air made his head spin. Ash reached into his jacket and pulled out a packet of cigarettes. He offered them to Kyle.

"No thanks."

He lit one for himself and they walked over to the fence where they'd been arguing only yesterday. How things had changed. They leaned on the railing, and gazed down at the ocean. The moonlight reflected brightly on the water, Ash turned and saw the same light reflected in Kyle's dark eyes.

"You've really never been surfing?"

"When would I have the time? I practically live at this place..." he turned his head to look at the restaurant. It was true that Kyle didn't have much time off. Ash turned and leaned his back against the railing, it was easier to smoke that way.

"We should do this again sometime," Ash suggested. "Maybe somewhere with music though, instead of you and Denny's crappy games..." He blew a puff of smoke in to the air. Kyle laughed.

"Yeah might be safer..." The moon was getting low in the sky, vaguely Ash wondered what time it actually was. He reached for his phone but his pocket was empty.

"Ah shit, I left my phone upstairs." Kyle fished through his pocket for the key. "Forget it," Ash said, he couldn't be bothered to go back for it, "I'll grab it in the morning."

"Nah, it's fine," Kyle insisted, going to unlock the door. Ash dropped his cigarette, scuffed it out and followed Kyle upstairs. His phone was on the bar where he'd left it. He had several missed calls from Denny.

"Shit." He dialled her back.

"What is it?" Kyle asked with concern, picking up on Ash's urgency. He didn't have time to answer before Denny picked up.

"Ash," she sobbed.

"Denny? What is it? What's wrong?" He had a pretty good idea though when he remembered who had taken her home. "Was it Andy?" Ash would kill him if he'd touched her. She sobbed again, confirming his suspicions. "It's alright Denny. Are you at home?"

"Yes," she sniffed.

"Is Hannah there?"

"No, they're all away. Can you come?"

"Yep. Listen, it's gonna be alright. Just stay there. I'm on my way." He ended the call and looked to Kyle. "We need to get to the farm now."

xxx

"I swear to Christ I'll kill him!" Ash fumed, smacking his hand on the dashboard. Kyle had agreed to drive. Ash couldn't afford to get into any trouble with still being on parole. Kyle attempted to calm him by getting him to focus on making sure Denny was okay for the time being, rather than flogging the shit out of Andy.

"Did she say what happened?"

"No."

"Don't jump to conclusions then."

"How can I not?!" Ash snapped. "Doesn't take a genius to figure it out. Didn't you see the way he was looking at her? Fuck! I should never have let him take her home..." Ash had allowed it because Andy was the only one that had been under the limit.

"It's not your job to take care of her."

"No? Whose is it then?" Ash bit back. Kyle didn't reply, obviously feeling guilty. They turned into the driveway and Ash leapt out of the ute before it had even rolled to a stop, he found Denny on the veranda. Her face was streaked with tears, and she hugged her knees. He went to her, wanting to hold her but wasn't sure if he should touch her. His doubts were relieved when she flung herself into his arms.

"I'm a terrible person," she sobbed.

"No. No you're not," he soothed, stroking her hair. "This isn't your fault, he shouldn't have touched you." She didn't reply, she just clung to him and cried. He let her go for a minute but he had to know if she was hurt, if maybe she needed a doctor. The thought made him sick, but he had to ask. "Did he hurt you? Do you need a doctor?"

"No, no nothing like that," she assured, shaking her head as she pulled back and wiped her eyes.

"Where is he now?" Ash asked. Now that he knew Denny was physically okay he could deal with that piece of shit Andy. When Ash was done with the dog he was gonna wish he'd never been born. A frown creased her brow and then an understanding dawned on her. "He didn't... No Ash, it's not what you think. It's my fault."

"Don't let him make you think that."

"No, listen," she pleaded, "I started it. I, I just wanted to forget, but then he saw Casey's ring," she wrapped her hand around the engagement ring that hung from a chain around her neck. "How could I do that to him? Andy left as soon as I asked him to. But Case? Case deserved better." Her eyes widened in horror as she looked over Ash's shoulder and he realised Kyle must be there. Kyle was Casey's brother and she thought she'd been unfaithful.

"Why would you bring him here?" Denny asked on the edge of hysteria, her knuckles turning white as she clutched the ring. Alcohol and turbulent emotions were not a good mix.

"He drove," Ash explained calmly, "we've been drinking. I can't afford to get busted on parole."

"Oh God!" Denny exclaimed, raking a hand through her hair, "I shouldn't have called..."

"Yes you should have," Kyle interceded, "we want to be here for you." She was almost wild in her drunk and guilt ridden state.

"C'mon Den, let's get you to bed," Ash encouraged, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, "things'll look better in the morning." He guided her inside, Kyle going ahead of them. He opened her door and helped Ash get her into bed.

"I'm gonna stay here," Ash told Kyle when she was settled, kicking off his boots and settling himself on the bed beside her.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" Kyle questioned.

"I can't leave her alone. What if she wakes up and freaks out again?" Ash was scared she'd do something silly, something to hurt herself if he left her alone. Kyle gave him a disapproving look. "What?" Ash fired at him, "what do you think I'm gonna do?"

"Nothing. She's just in a fragile state is all..."

"Exactly-"

"I get that you want to help her but I'm not sure waking up with a guy in her bed is the best thing for her right now."

"Look, I'm not gonna leave her, it'll be fine, you should go." Still Kyle hesitated. "It's fine Kyle," Ash insisted and he knew there was one thing he could say to make Kyle understand that he posed no threat. "I'm gay and she knows it. She called because she needs me here." A look of shock played across Kyle's face but Ash's plan worked.

"Alright. I'll see you in the morning yeah?"

"Yeah okay," Ash agreed before Kyle left him to it. So his secret was out but Ash didn't care. He'd do anything for Denny because she was his mate, and that's what true mates did.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: So this is me adding violence to the warnings for this story…**

Ash had no idea what time it was when Denny finally woke, but the sun was well and truly up. She looked confused for a second but then her memory caught up with her consciousness.

"Oh God," she groaned, her hand going to rest on her head. "Was it as bad as I think it was?"

"That depends," Ash told her, "how bad do you think it was?"

"Pretty bad. I can't believe I dragged you here over nothing." Ash frowned.

"It wasn't nothing. You're still grieving and he took advantage of that. Wanna talk about it?"

"No, not really," she winced, closing her eyes and pushing back a wave of nausea he was willing to bet. He was wondering if he needed to get out of range when she fixed him with a thoughtful look.

"You told him."

"How do you know that? You were supposed to be asleep."

"With you two bickering like an old married couple? Hardly..."

"As if..."

"Thanks. I do appreciate what you've done."

"Yeah well, better me to tell him then he find out some other way..."

"Still, thank-you. I'm gonna go take a shower."

"You could do with one," he teased, wrinkling his nose up.

"Righto you," she said, hitting him playfully and giving him a sassy grin.

"That's my girl," he said, ruffling her hair. It was nice to see a smile on her face. She climbed out of bed to gather some fresh clothes and he left her to it.

Ash felt like shit. He scrubbed his hands over his face and stepped outside for some fresh air. He knew tiredness was his main problem, he stayed awake most of the night to watch her.

"You're a good friend," came Kyle's voice from somewhere to his right, "how's Denny?"

"Jesus!" Ash exclaimed, not expecting anyone to be there, "yeah, she's alright. What the hell are you still doing here?" Kyle stood and came to lean on the rail beside him.

"I thought you guys might need me, or at least the car if Denny decided she did need a doctor..."

"So you slept on the veranda..."

"Yeah. Long night huh?"

"Yep. You can stick your free booze from now on by the way..." Kyle chuckled and they lapsed into silence. Ash shoved a hand in his pocket, unexpectedly finding the paper from last night. He pulled it out and unravelled it. Denise Miller SEVOL Casey Braxton, was scrawled on the paper and a final percentage of three. It didn't mean anything but to a drunk it might. He felt shitty about pushing her towards Andy last night. He shouldn't have said anything about that ninety-whatever percent. He needed to make a mends. What a day this was already turning out to be. And he dreaded the thought of having to work today, he hadn't had any real sleep in twenty-four hours, not to mention the headache he felt brewing. "I'm thinking about chucking a sickie. What do you reckon my boss would say?"

"I reckon he'd be okay with it." Ash nodded his thanks and pulled a cigarette from his pocket. He drew in the soothing smoke and blew it out.

"Don't blow that shit in my face," Kyle frowned. Crap.

"Sorry..." Ash waved his hand his hand about to dissipate the smoke as looked around for somewhere to stub the cigarette out. He chose a nearby flowerpot.

"Don't leave that there."

"Christ! What are you? The environment police?" Ash said, even as he picked the damn thing up. He walked into the kitchen, ran some water over it and threw it in the bin. Kyle followed him. Ash had a feeling they were heading towards a certain conversation.

"We should make Denny breakfast," he suggested as a distraction. "What do you want? Bacon? Eggs?" he asked as he rooted through the fridge.

"Are you sure? I don't think I could stomach that right now."

"Oh c'mon, a greasy breakfast is the best thing for ya after a night on the grog." Kyle didn't look convinced but he did begin to help with the preparations.

"What's going on here?" Denny asked with a smile in her voice as she looked back and forwards between them.

"Breakfast," Ash declared.

"Kyle," she said softly, drawing his attention, "I'm sorry about last night."

"Don't sweat it Den. Happens to the best of us. You want some of this nauseating food?"

"Hey!" Ash protested, his food was good! She laughed.

"Maybe a coffee?"

"Coming right up," Kyle said. While he went about that, she took the opportunity to catch Ash's eye, she gave him a wide grin and two thumbs up. He rolled his eyes, romance with Kyle was the last thing on his mind right now. He had to make sure she was really okay and then he still had a certain someone to deal with.

xxx

"You sure you're okay?" Ash fussed.

"Yes for the billionth time," Denny said with exasperation.

"Okay chickie. Well call me if you need anything."

"Yes mum," she said, rolling her eyes.

"I mean it," Ash reiterated firmly. His tone took the sparkle out of her smile.

"I know," she said softly, then she pulled him into a hug.

Kyle watched them from the driver's seat. They said their goodbyes and Ash climbed into the ute beside him. Ash and Denny hadn't known each other long but you'd swear they'd been friends forever. Kyle wondered about their bond.

"How did you and Denny actually meet?"

"Through Brax."

"Obviously I know that, it's just you guys are so close. Why? Why are you so determined to look after her?"

"She's a cool chick," was Ash's simple response.

"There's gotta be more to it than that..."

Ash sighed.

"She was Casey's girl."

"But you never met Case..."

"No, but he was Brax's brother..."

"So you do it for Brax?" Ash just shrugged. That made sense Kyle supposed but somehow he thought there might be more to it than that. Still, he let it go.

"Let's talk about you," Ash said after an extended silence. "You always been this..."

"This what?" Kyle prompted. Ash shot him a look.

"Nosey?"

"You're the one asking questions," he shot back.

"Forget it." They fell into silence again, though it wasn't an easy one this time. Kyle felt the beginnings of anger churning within him, but he shut it down. They were both tired and anxious and a little hung over, he could forgive Ash this time.

xxx

A little while later they pulled up at the house. Ash was still brooding over making a fool of himself with his attempt at getting to know Kyle better. Kyle headed straight for the shower, probably to get away from him, which was why Ash was alone when Andy walked in. Perfect.

"Any last words?"

Andy tensed immediately, turning wide eyes towards him.

"I didn't do anything."

"No? Then you won't mind stepping outside for a chat."

"I'd rather not..."

"And I'd rather not break Brax's furniture or get blood on his carpet, but I will."

Andy gulped, but to his credit he didn't argue anymore, he just headed out the back.

"Look Ash, I don't want any trouble. She's a good looking chick, I wasn't gonna say no. But she freaked out and I left. Straight away, I swear it. It was nothing-"

"Nothing? You didn't spend all night consoling her."

"I..." Andy frowned, "it didn't mean anything."

"Wrong answer Barrett," Ash said, getting ready to knock Andy on his arse. "I mighta been able to forgive you if you cared about her. But doing that to her just for the hell of it? It's inexcusable." Ash decided he'd had enough of talking. In the blink of an eye he had Andy sprawled face down on the on the lawn, his knee pressed heavily into the rotten bastards back. He twisted one of Andy's arms up until his shoulder socket threatened to pop, Andy's other arm was pinned helplessly beneath his body. Ash used his other hand to push Andy's head into the ground.

"I do care about her," Andy protested, as he struggled to free himself.

"You say that now, but you've got a funny way of showing it. Don't you dare lay another finger on her. Got it?" He gave one final push, making sure Andy tasted dirt before he let the mongrel go. Ash stood up and watched as Andy started to get to his feet.

"You know," Andy spat, "who Denny sees is none of your business." How fucking stupid was he? Andy had managed by this stage to make it to his hands and knees.

"We'll fucking see about that." Ash drove his boot into Andy's ribs, knocking him to the ground again. Andy clutched his side and groaned. That'd be a nice little reminder to keep his hands to himself every time he took a breath for the next fortnight. Ash was just deciding whether Andy needed another kick to make the message really sink in when he heard his name being called.

"Ash!" he looked towards the house to see Brax beckoning him over.


	6. Chapter 6

"It's hard to believe he made it out of prison alive," Ash commented.

"He barely did. The doc had to patch up a stab wound when he wandered back into town. You alright Andy?" Brax called across the yard.

"Yep, fine," he answered clutching his side and heading in the opposite direction.

"Not sure you needed to put the boot in mate," Brax mused, focusing on Ash once again. They watched Andy slink off out the side gate before Ash turned a questioning look to Brax. He'd thought Brax would be more upset about his guard dog getting a touch up. Not that Andy deserved his concern. "Kyle told me about what happened. I think you impressed him." Really? Ash shrugged.

"Better than having him tear shreds off me I guess." Now it was Brax's turn to raise an eyebrow. "He warned me off Denny." Ash couldn't hide his smile at the irony, Brax grinned too. He knew about Ash's preferences because Ash had told him. That was the thing about prison. If everyone knew you were gay, nobody cared. But if you hid it and they found out you'd been keeping secrets, you were in big trouble. He'd seen blokes bashed nearly to death because of it.

"He's obviously unaware then."

"No. I mean he was, but I told him last night. He was hassling me about Denny again. Where is he anyway?"

"He's gone to work."

"Seriously?" The bloke was unbelievable. Hadn't he heard of time off? He was the boss for Christ's sake. He needed to give himself a break. "Well when he gets home, tell him I'm stealing his bed." Ash took a step towards said bed, ready for some serious shuteye when Brax stopped him.

"Hey," his former cellmate said, grabbing his arm and becoming very serious all of a sudden. "You've made your point with Andy, now make sure you let it go." Ash shrugged him off. He'd keep his hands to himself if Andy did.

xxx

Maybe it was falling asleep with Kyle's scent in his nostrils that made Ash dream of him. He couldn't remember specifics, just that he and Kyle had been there and that they were happy. Suddenly he was aware that he wasn't alone on the bed. Ash sprang up off it, waking Kyle in the process. Kyle? What the hell was he doing here?

"What? What is it?" Kyle grumbled. Ash didn't know what to say, he actually felt like a bit of an idiot for his overreaction reaction.

"Nothing. What are you doing here?"

"I wasn't gonna sleep on the lounge and I didn't want to wake you. Though maybe I should have, you drooled on my pillow..." Ash ran a hand over his mouth and stared at the pillow.

"Sorry."

"I was kidding..."

It was dark outside, he hadn't meant to sleep so long.

"Shit! What time is it? Have you heard from Denny?" Ash searched around for his phone. "I didn't mean to sleep all day..."

"Yes, she's fine." That was a relief. Ash scrubbed his hands over his face. "I'm still getting used to not sleeping on alert. I haven't had a good night's sleep since Brax left lock up..." Kyle watched him thoughtfully. Shit, Ash hadn't meant to admit so much.

"You missed him."

"I guess. At least I knew he wasn't gonna throttle me in my sleep. I'm gonna go take a shower." He wasn't even sure how long it had been since he'd had one.

Once he was out of Kyle's room he tried calling Denny.

"Hey Den. Just checking in. Call me if you need anything." She wasn't answering her phone. Ash didn't let it worry him too much, Kyle had assured him she was okay.

The water brought him to his senses he hadn't expected to wake up with Kyle beside him. Was it weird for a straight guy to do that knowing he was gay? Or was he reading too much into it? Ash rinsed his hair and forgot about it. Whatever would be would be.

xxx

The following day he ran into Denny outside the bait shop. She was tinkering with a boat motor. He called to her and she looked up with grease smudged across her forehead, it made him smile. She didn't return it though.

"What's happening Miller?" he said, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Ash," she nodded. It wasn't the enthusiastic greeting he usually got.

"What's wrong?"

She sat her tools down, put her hands on her hips and fixed him with a serious look.

"You have to ask?"

"Well yeah," he frowned, "I'm not a bloody mind reader." She glared at him. "What?"

"You beat Andy up, that's what. I told you it was my fault."

"Hardly," Ash scoffed. "It was one kick. He got up and walked away didn't he?"

"That doesn't make it okay."

"I don't get it. Don't you want him to leave you alone?"

"Even if I do, beating the crap out of him isn't the answer." Ash was at a loss. He'd done this to help her but she was less than impressed. He thought she'd be pleased she wouldn't have to deal with Andy's octopus hands again.

"I'm sorry?"

"I'm not the one you need to apologise to." That was out of the question.

"If you think I'm gonna say sorry to that creep, you've got another thing coming." She stared at him defiantly. "Don't look at me like that. I was only trying to help. He's the one that hurt you, not me." This wasn't fair. Why couldn't she see he only had her best interests at heart? He'd do anything to keep her safe. And now she was looking at him like he was the enemy. How did he fix this? He didn't want to fight with her. "I'm sorry I've upset you. I honestly thought I was helping. I'd never do anything to hurt you Denny, don't you know that?" He needed her to believe that because it was the truth. He'd been down this road once before and he couldn't let it happen again. He saw her expression soften and then she stepped forward and hugged him.

"I do. I do know that." He held her close, needing her to know how important she was to him.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: So Ash and Denny finally met on Home & Away last night. It went pretty much like I imagined it would, they bonded over fixing stuff and Ash was understanding about Casey. The timeline for this story is obviously different to the show, I already have them as friends by this stage. I am however going to steal a few plot points from the show in the next couple of chapters. Ash and Brax road-tripping it to the desert together is just too irresistible. Enjoy! **

Ash had never thought he'd be a model employee anywhere. He was the kinda bloke who robbed banks rather than do a full day's work, but maybe the system worked. Maybe his stint in jail had taught him his lesson because lately he found himself staying back to help the boss pack up after closing. Surely that had to earn him some allowances.

"Hey Kyle?"

"Yeah?"

"You reckon I could get a couple of days off?"

"Sure, what for?" Strictly, that wasn't any of Kyle's business but Ash didn't mind telling him.

"To look for Billie. I gave up too easily last time."

"Your sister?"

"Yeah. Last I knew she was in Newcastle. I might head up there and see what I can find out." Kyle watched him intently as he spoke, it was one of the things he liked about the bloke. How he was always so present in the moment.

"What's she like?" Kyle asked. Ash hesitated, it'd been so long since he'd seen her. And then there were two Billie's. The crazy, fun-loving girl he'd grown up with, and the one who put up with Dean. He didn't like the second one as much but she was most likely the one he'd find if he went looking. "It's okay," Kyle's voice cut through his thoughts, "you don't have to tell me." Ash pulled himself out of his musings and looked into Kyle's sincere brown eyes.

"Na, it's alright. I was just thinking about how Dean ruined both our lives. One person shouldn't be allowed to do that to a whole family..."

"No, they shouldn't," Kyle agreed. "What will you do if you find them?"

"Get her away from him." Ash couldn't decipher the look that passed over Kyle's face then, but he knew it wasn't good. "What?"

"I..." Kyle shook his head, "no, it's nothing, doesn't matter."

"No, c'mon. Tell me."

Kyle sighed, and fixed him with a steady look.

"Just be careful, okay? Don't forget how you ended up in prison the first time."

"You don't think I should go?"

"It's not that, it's just... Like I said. Be careful yeah?" Ash nodded and got back to wiping the tables. He'd been keen to get up to Newcastle but now he wasn't so sure...

xxx

Denny hadn't been spending quite as much time at Angelo's as she usually would. It was both good and bad. Ash hoped it meant she was healing, but it also meant he didn't see her as much. And in some ways that gave him more cause to worry. He tracked her down at the bait shop. She was still mucking around with the same motor she had been the other day.

"That thing still giving you grief?"

"Yeah," she answered, wiping a greasy hand across her forehead. He couldn't help his grin.

"I just did it again, didn't it?" she sighed.

"Yeah but it's cute, leave it there." She shrugged. "Want me to help you with this?" he asked.

"It's okay, it's work. You don't have to."

"I know, but it might just be something simple." She gave him an unimpressed look.

"I didn't mean it like that," he defended, "I just have a knack with these things sometimes..." That didn't seem to help either. "Look, just give me minute. Can't hurt right?"

"Be my guest," she said, stepping aside obviously because she thought he couldn't do this. He rolled up his sleeves and got to work. He made a few adjustments, just things he'd learned from tinkering as a kid. Unlike cars, boats weren't his area of expertise. Denny'd learned the same way and for that very reason their educations and experiences were entirely unique. What she found difficult he sometimes found easy and vice versa.

"We're good, right Den?" he said, his eyes still on the motor rather than her face.

"Yeah," she said, "'course we are." He didn't like the overly-enthusiastic way she said it, she was hiding something. He brushed his hair out of his face and made one final tweak to the motor before standing. He looked her in the eye and could see some doubt there.

"I'd never touch a chick, you know that right? I just wanted to scare him..."

"I know," she said, her serious expression melting away and something of the old sparkle he was used to lighting up her eyes. She tossed him a rag to wipe his hands.

"Good. Now try that." She stepped forward and pulled the ripcord, the motor whirred to life.

"Nice work Ashford," she appreciated, "I'll have to get you to teach me that one."

"Sure thing, as soon as I get back."

"You're going somewhere?"

"I'm heading to Newcastle to see what I can find out about Billie."

"You think she's still there?"

"I dunno. Guess I'll find out. Promise you'll stay out of trouble while I'm gone?"

"Can't make any promises but I'll try." That would have to do. "And Ash?" she added with a grin.

"Yeah?"

"You might wanna use that rag on your cheek too."

xxx

"You call if you need anything," Brax said.

"Will do," Ash replied as he threw his bag into the back of Brax's sick Holden ute he was being given the honour for borrowing. She was a 2010 model but to Ash she was a brand newie. He'd been locked up the year before she was manufactured and he was keen to get her out on the open road for a spin. "Where's Kyle?" Ash had hoped to speak to him again before he left. Brax gave him a wry look. Of course...

"Work," they said in unison.

"You need to talk to him?" Brax asked.

"Na, all good," Ash fibbed, he'd call Kyle from the road. "Well I guess I'll see you in a couple of days..." Hopefully with Billie beside him.

"Good luck with it mate." Ash hopped in the ute and headed off.

Once he was on the road he called Kyle.

"Hey mate. Anyone ever tell ya you work too hard?"

"Someone's gotta. What's up? You on the road?"

"Yep. Listen, will you keep an eye on Denny for me? Just in case she needs anything?"

"You think she will?"

"I hope not. I still don't trust Andy though."

"I think he learned his lesson there. How are you two getting on?"

"We don't really see each other, I think he might be avoiding me."

"Funny that. And yeah, I'll be here if Denny needs me."

"Thanks mate."

"Hey Ash?"

"Yeah?"

"Just remember, be careful, okay?"

"Okay."

"And Ash?

"Yeah?"

"Good luck."

"Thanks." Ash ended the call. He gunned the engine to put the ute through her paces. Now he had Denny sorted he could concentrate on the task ahead.

xxx

Newcastle turned out to be a bust, but not a complete dead end. Billie was gone but he had a lead. Broken Hill of all places. That was a bit more of an effort than a quick trip along the coast though. For now he was back in Summer Bay.

"If this Dean is as bad as you say he is, you need someone to have your back out there," Kyle told him. Ash agreed.

"I'll ask Brax."

"Brax has Ricky, let me do it."

"No," Ash shot back. "Brax can handle himself, we'll be fine."

"I can handle myself too," Kyle pointed out.

"Not like Brax. Besides, I know how he operates."

"This is stupid Ash, I can do this."

"I said no, alright? Brax is the best one for it." Ash was glad when Kyle finally accepted that, even if the bloke didn't look at all happy about it.

**AN: Thanks for reading and especially to those who've reviewed :)**


	8. Chapter 8

Brax pulled up in an unfamiliar duel cab.

"Where'd you get the wheels?" Ash asked.

"Andy sorted it." Ash let that go. At least this truck would be up for some bush bashing and the good thing about these older models was that they still had ashtrays. Ash chucked his bag in the back.

"Brax, don't do this." Ricky had just walked outside. Ash wandered around to the passenger's side to give them some semblance of privacy. He didn't want Brax to give into her though, so he didn't go too far.

"It's done," Brax said. "We'll be back in a few days."

"I don't like it," she said.

"You don't have to," he told her, "just accept it. Nothing's gonna happen."

"You don't know that."

"I won't let it," Ash chimed in, having made is way around the front of the vehicle. They didn't have time to muck around, they were staring down the barrel of a fourteen hour drive as it was. She gave him an unimpressed look. Again they didn't have time for it. Brax sensed that too and climbed in the vehicle. Ash followed suit.

"See you in a few days," Brax told her as he pulled out onto the street. She glared after them, but Ash couldn't feel guilty. So she was going to be without her boyfriend for a few days. Billie had been without anyone who cared about her for six years. She had to be his priority.

xxx

They'd been on the road for hours now. Ash had told Brax about every car he'd ever done up because he was building up the courage to ask what he really wanted to, and he'd finally reached the point where he'd run out of cars.

"Tell me if I'm outta line here mate," Ash ventured, "but what's the deal with Kyle?"

"The deal?"

"Denny said something about an old girlfriend?"

"Phoebe? She was a mad rat of a thing. I don't think she ever listened to a word he said. She blew into town demanding to be his girlfriend and then pissed off back to Melbourne as soon as the going got tough. I think they dated when they were kids or something..."

"And since then?"

"What's this about?"

"You really gonna make me say it?" Ash groaned.

"No way," Brax grinned, "you've got a thing for Kyle?"

"Well you're smiling, so I'll take that as a sign it's okay to say yes?"

"Yeah mate, I trust ya. But good luck with that."

"What d'ya mean?"

"I heard he's got a big brother that packs a mean punch. Better not do anything to piss him off, yeah?"

"Hurting him is the last thing I wanna do."

"Just as long as you keep that in mind it should be sweet then." Ash was pretty sure that was an approval, but also Brax's way of making him think before he tried anything. It worked.

xxx

It was close enough to midnight when they rolled into town. They hit the first pub they came across and the second. It was on their way into the third one that Ash was really starting to get sick of everything.

"Can't we just ask?"

"No," Brax said firmly. "We get a feel for the place first. You don't know how many mates he's got here." That was true enough, so Ash continued to follow Brax's lead.

This pub was much like the first two. Blokes drinking beer and sport on TV. But Brax? Well he reacted differently this time. He made a beeline straight for a bloke at the bar. Ash followed.

"Hey Doc. How are ya?" The bloke sat his beer down and turned towards them.

"Brax!" The bloke beamed at him, sticking his hand out in greeting. Brax shook the offered hand.

"This is my mate Ash," Brax said, indicating towards him. Ash shook his hand.

"Nice to meet ya."

"This is Sid Walker," Brax explained, "he used to be the doctor in Yabbie Creek. His daughter owned the gym. How is Indi?"

"Yeah, she's good mate. All settled in at her new job. I was sorry to hear about Casey, my condolences." Brax nodded. "What brings you blokes all the way out here?"

"We're looking for someone," Ash cut in, taking the opportunity to actually ask the question. "My sister Billie. She kicks around with a nasty piece of work called Dean. You heard of them?" The doctor thought for a moment.

"You mean Billie Ashford? She had a bad habit of walking into doors. I patched her up more than once. Never could get her to report it though."

"That's her," Ash said quickly, desperate for more information.

"I haven't seen her in a while. I think I heard they left town." He turned and called to the red-haired bartender. "Hey Bluey? You seen Dean & Billie around lately?"

"Na mate," the bartender answered, "they shot through to White Cliffs."

"There you go," Sid said. "The bush telegraph..." He took a swig of his beer.

"How long will it take us to get there?" Ash questioned.

"Three hours. But you can't go now. No one drives around after dark here, the roos are a nightmare." Ash couldn't accept that, they were so close. Brax must've seen it on his face.

"He's right mate," Brax said. "Besides we've already been in the car all day. Better to get some sleep and start fresh in the morning." He turned to the bartender. "Hey Bluey? Got a couple of rooms for the night?"

**AN: Couldn't resist a Doctor Sid cameo ;) Wish the H&A writers had felt the same. Thanks for reading :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: So you all know what happened between Brax, Ash and Dean in the outback. I haven't actually rewritten those scenes because I figure they played out exactly the same. What I have written are the 'in-between' bits. Still not sure about what Sam did, haven't decided yet if I'm gonna use that or not. Dunno if Brax needs the shitstorm that will bring. Anyway, for now enjoy!**

Kyle was only half focused on the job at hand. As he restacked the glasses behind the bar he kept an eye on Denny who'd just been joined at her table by Andy. It seemed like an impromptu decision of Denny's to ask him to join her for lunch but he wondered if he should say something. He'd promised Ash he'd watch out for her. It was funny how determined he was to keep that promise. Maybe it was because Case wasn't here to answer to and Ash was, or maybe it was because he didn't trust Andy either. Andy did seem to be keeping his distance though. They talked and laughed together but that was it. He didn't try to touch Denny, she didn't look in any way upset. In fact the bright smiles she gave Andy made Kyle a little uneasy, they were too much like the ones she gave Ash. He decided not to intervene though as along as the status quo didn't change. If Andy tried anything, or she began to look uncomfortable he'd be over there in a heartbeat, but for now he'd just keep an eye out.

xxx

Brax had never seen Ash like this. Drunk wasn't something that happened in lock up and the few times Brax had seen him pissed since his release Ash had been in a relatively good mood. This was different. They'd managed to track Dean down but there'd been no sign of Billie and Dean said she was gone. Ash was a mess. Apart from suspecting something sinister had happened to his sister, Brax knew how shitty it felt to let your family down and Ash was feeling that right now. Brax also knew what it felt like to have nothing left to lose and he was worried about what Ash might do. So he put his foot down on ordering another round and hauled his drunken friend up. Ash argued but Brax managed to persuade him it was bedtime and they headed for their rooms. Brax unlocked the door to Ash's room and guided him in.

"I wish he was here," Ash slurred.

"Who? Dean?" Brax questioned as he deposited Ash onto the bed.

"Well yeah, I could kill him then. But no, Kyle. He wanted to come with me you know, but I couldn't let him, not out here, not with Dean. What if something happened to him?"

"Good thinking mate..."

"He fell asleep next to me once," Ash continued. "Right beside me on the same bed. He knew about me. What do you think that means?"

"I dunno mate, maybe you should ask him that." This wasn't a conversation Brax needed to have.

"You reckon I should?" Ash asked eagerly. Brax hadn't been serious, he was just trying to appease a drunk.

"Dunno. Maybe you should sleep on it?" Brax suggested while easing Ash back down.

"Maybe..." Brax pulled Ash's boots off but that was as far as the service extended.

"Sleep it off mate and we'll start looking again in the morning. We'll find her."

xxx

Ash felt like shit the following morning. Jesus, he'd really tied one on last night. He didn't even remember how he got back here. Judging by the sun it was already getting late. He checked his phone. It was well after ten. Fuck! He was supposed to be out here looking for Billie, not writing himself off and sleeping half the fucking day away. There was also a message from Kyle, checking in to see how they were getting on. He didn't have time for this so he just punched in the word 'fine' and hit send. He pulled his boots on and headed next door. He bashed on Brax's door to no avail.

"He's not there," came a voice from behind him, "your vehicles gone."

"Shit. Do you know where he went?"

"Na," Sam the bartender told him, "but he must have left before sun up."

"Bloody idiot..." Ash muttered.

"Hey, you want some breakfast?" The bartender offered.

"Sure," Ash accepted. He couldn't do anything without a vehicle, and at least this way he might get some intel on Billie if the bartender was as friendly as he seemed.

xxx

Lingering looks, not-so-casual touches, what the hell was she thinking? The status quo had definitely changed since yesterday but not in the way Kyle had expected. His phone beeped. **Fine**. That was the entire message from Ash. Well he was Brax's mate, Kyle shouldn't have expected anything more than that. Still, he hated not knowing what was going on with Brax and Ash out there in the desert. He knew the last time Brax had gone outback he'd run into trouble. He knew because he'd been that trouble. Andy got up and left but Denny didn't, here was his chance.

"Hey Denny. I'm taking my break. Wanna come with?"

"Sure," she agreed with a smile, getting up to follow him outside.

It didn't take long for him to wipe that smile off her face.

"I noticed you've been hanging out with Andy a bit..."

"Yeah, so?" she shot back, immediately on the defence. It fired Kyle up too.

"So how can you do this to Ash? He's been an amazing friend to you."

"Ash? What's this got to do with him? This is about Andy. Case gave him a second chance and I can't do any less."

"And look where that got him." She shot him a dangerous look. "Look, we only want the best for you Den. Me and Ash, we just don't wanna see you get hurt. We care about you."

"Really? Because he isn't even here, is he? He didn't even bother to say goodbye." What did Kyle say to that? It wasn't that Ash didn't care, it was just that he didn't worry about stuff like that if he thought everything was okay. And she'd said she was okay. But if push came to shove, he'd be there when she needed him. Of that Kyle was certain.

xxx

When Brax finally rolled back into town he had a surprise for Ash, in the form of forty grands worth of stolen cash. Brax was cagey about the details but what it boiled down to was that he'd dealt with Dean, Ash had his loot back if he wanted it and Billie was still nowhere to be found. Ash didn't want the money. All it had ever done for him was buy a prison sentence, well that and turn his sister against him. Ash hated having to leave not knowing where she was but Brax insisted it was time to go home. Ash couldn't argue with that, Brax had gone above and beyond for him. Besides, not everyone's family was missing, and Brax had his to get back to.

"Give me five minutes, then we can go." Ash grabbed a fistful of cash and marched off down the dusty street.

It was indeed five minutes later when he came back. He climbed into the ute beside Brax.

"Here," he said, tossing a jewellery case into Brax's lap.

"What's this?"

"Open it." Brax lifted the lid to find an opal pendent. It was nice, striking blues and greens in a fancy silver setting. It also looked expensive.

"Oh Ash, you shouldn't have..." Brax teased. Ash rolled his eyes.

"Give it to Ricky. Chicks like shiny things right?"


	10. Chapter 10

It was 2am when Kyle heard the truck pull up in the driveway. He hadn't bothered to go to bed, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep until he saw for himself that his brother and his friend were okay. Now that they were here found he was excited to see them, he'd missed Ash's cheeky grin. But the man who stepped through the door wasn't the one who'd left. Something was different.

"I'm wrecked," Ash announced, heading for the couch. He sounded okay. Maybe Kyle was overthinking it, maybe he was just tired.

"You can take my bed," Kyle offered, sensing that Ash needed it more than he did. He didn't bother asking if they'd found Billie, the answer was clear enough.

"Thanks," Ash said automatically, diverting his course towards the bedroom. Kyle watched him disappear into the hallway, noticed the defeated slump of his shoulders and knew he couldn't leave it at that, so he followed.

Ash had flicked the bedside lamp on and a soft light filled the room. Kyle stopped in the doorway. He leaned against the frame and crossed his arms.

"It didn't go like you'd expected?"

"No," Ash sighed, pulling his shirt off and throwing it aside, "it pretty much did."

"You'll find her," Kyle told him, as Ash lay down on the bed, tucking his hands behind his head. Kyle ventured in and sat on the edge of the bed so he could see Ash's face. He looked worn out.

"What makes you so sure?"

"I remember when I came looking for the boys. It was all I could think about. You'll find her because you'll never stop looking until you do. She's your family."

Ash closed his eyes as he silently mulled that over. Kyle decided it was time to let him sleep. He moved to get up but suddenly a hand clamped around his wrist. Kyle's eyes met Ash's sad blue ones.

"Stay?"

Kyle did.

xxx

When Ash woke he wasn't alone. Kyle lay beside him and for the first time Ash really just wanted to wrap his arms around him and pull him close. He didn't want this space between them anymore. But he didn't act on it, Kyle was a good friend to him, and that was important to Ash too. He wouldn't jeopardise that. He checked his phone and smiled when he saw the time. Kyle was late for work. He sent a quick text to Mackenzie asking her to cover the shift. She was a capable chick, she could handle it.

Beside him Kyle stirred.

"What time is it?" he wondered, reaching for his phone. His reaction was about what Ash expected.

"Shit!" he made to fly out of bed but Ash grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Relax Luke, someone else can cut the sugar cane today." Kyle gave him a baffled look.

"What?" he blinked.

"The Thorn Birds..." Ash supplied. Kyle raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously? Isn't that a show for grandmas? Pretty sure it was around before we were born." Ash shrugged.

"It was one of Gran's favourites." Okay now he was in bed with Kyle talking about his grandma. "I texted Mackenzie."

"Okay," Kyle nodded, finally relaxing. Ash let go of his arm and sat up. Kyle fixed him with a thoughtful look, as they sat facing each other. "How are you this morning?"

"I'm okay. I'd say Brax has got more to worry about. Ricky wasn't very happy with us." Ash wasn't proud of the trouble he'd caused there.

"Brax can handle himself, remember? What about you? Billie's still out there somewhere."

"Yeah..." Ash frowned.

"What happened out there?" Kyle asked.

"We went to Broken Hill, ran into a fella Brax knew, he pointed us to White Cliffs-"

"Wait. Who'd you run into to?"

"A doctor, Sid something..."

"Walker?"

"Yeah, that's it."

"And he knew where Dean and Billie were?"

"He asked the bartender."

"Oh, okay. Sorry, you said he sent you to White Cliffs?"

"Yeah. So we went out there and found Dean's place but she wasn't there. We asked him a few questions but he reckoned he didn't know where she'd gone."

"You believed him?"

"Brax did. Considering the circumstances I don't think he'd lie..." Ash had to believe that, the alternative was too awful to consider. He couldn't think of his baby sister like that. She had to be alive and out there somewhere for him to find. But...

"Ash?" Kyle interrupted his thoughts. Ash looked up at him and when Kyle looked at him like that he could almost believe there was something more between them. That they did share a deeper connection. He trusted Kyle and so he voiced the terrible thought.

"He had her car. I did that car up for her. She either hates me so much she left it behind, or he kept it when he..." killed her. He couldn't say that part out loud.

"She'll be okay Ash," Kyle assured, resting a hand on his shoulder. "She probably saw her chance and took off. She must've known Dean would be able to track down the car." Ash hadn't thought of that.

"You really think so?"

"She's your sister isn't she? That makes her more than a pretty face." Huh? Kyle realised too what he'd said. Neither of them had time to really process it though.

"Hey Kyle," came Josh's voice as he barged into the room. "Can I borrow-" he stopped short when he saw Ash. "Ash, you're back. Did you find your sister?"

"No mate, not yet..." Ash told him, as Kyle pulled his hand away. Josh seemed to realise then that he'd interrupted something.

"Oh well then," he said, backing out of the room, "I'll leave you guys to it..."

xxx

What a dumbass thing to say to a gay bloke Kyle silently berated himself as he walked into Angelo's later that morning. And talk about shitty timing, like Ash needed anything else to worry about. As if he didn't have enough on his plate without thinking that Kyle might be flirting with him too. Not that he supposed it really mattered, he wasn't gay. Anyway, he already had his suspicions about who Ash's secret crush was, but that was a whole other can of worms.

Kyle was at least pleased to see that the place hadn't fallen apart in his absence.

"Thanks Mackenzie," he told the brunette behind the bar.

"No worries Kyle. Any shift you need covered I can do it. I might just need a little more than five minutes notice next time."

"Fair enough. I appreciate your help." He couldn't expect more from his employees than he was willing to do himself.

He got to work but his mind was only half on the job. He wondered what it must be like to be different like Ash. To have to hide how you were feeling all the time. It must be hard, it was no wonder he was so down, if he had this to contend with on top of the whole Billie situation.

It was a few hours later when Ash walked in.

"How did I know I'd find you here?" he sighed. Kyle didn't bother answering that. He knew Ash thought he worked too much but obviously he hadn't come here just to tell him that. "I forgot to ask you about Denny before," Ash continued, "she okay?"

"Yeah..." Kyle hesitated, unsure about what to say. He didn't want to lie but he didn't want to rile Ash up either. "You can't ask her yourself?"

"Things were kinda weird between us before I left. I wanted to talk to you before I saw her." What could he say? There wasn't really anything to tell anyway, but he knew Ash wouldn't see it that way.

Ash tensed.

"What happened?" he asked, obviously sensing Kyle's discomfort.

"She's been hanging out with Andy a bit." Determination stole over Ash's face. "Hang on," Kyle hurried to say, "don't do anything stupid. I talked to her about it and she said she's just giving him a second chance because Case did." Ash was obviously torn by that and Kyle didn't know how to help. He was saved from having to come up with an immediate solution when Brax and Ricky walked in. When Ash saw them his face lit up. The smile he gave Brax was the first one Kyle had seen on his face since they'd come home. And Kyle knew then he was right, he'd have to talk to Brax about this. He didn't know what they'd be able to do but they had to do something. Kyle had thought Ash seemed different and this was why. A crush had turned into something more.

"I'm sorry it didn't work out how you'd hoped," Ricky offered, bringing a hand up to fiddle with her necklace. Ash shrugged.

"At least I know she's not with that loser anymore." They continued to talk but Kyle wasn't really listening. He was too busy trying to figure out how exactly he'd go about telling Brax his best mate had fallen in love with him.


	11. Chapter 11

"Brax I need to talk to you." Kyle bailed Brax up in the storeroom before opening so it was just the two of them. He had no idea how to say this but it was a conversation they needed to have. Ash needed to hear 'no' from Brax. Kyle didn't want this to hurt Ash any more than it already had, so it just needed sorting.

"So talk." Brax gave him that look, the one that said he thought Kyle was wasting his time, but he wasn't going to be brushed aside this time, not with something this important.

"Have you noticed anything strange going on with Ash?" The name certainly made Brax sit up and pay attention.

"What kinda strange?"

"Like how he flirts with chicks but never takes it any further..." God, this was awkward. Kyle never imagined he'd be having a conversation like this with his big brother.

"Stop beating around the bush. He's a poof, we both know that."

"You do?"

"He's my best mate. Why wouldn't I?"

"Then you know he's in love with you," Kyle rushed out. He thought Brax might be shocked, or angry, or even evasive, but instead a smirk formed on his face. "It's not funny," Kyle defended, "his feelings matter just as much as yours and mine." The smile grew wider.

"He's not in love with me you dope. What the hell gave you that idea?"

"He has to be," Kyle frowned. "The way he is with Denny, he does that for you. And when you left prison, he couldn't sleep anymore, and he was so adamant that no one else go to Broken Hill with him and he's been pretty down since you got back but when he saw you that changed..." Kyle trailed off, feeling kind of like an idiot under the amused look Brax gave him. Brax knew something he didn't.

"No, he didn't want _you_ going with him, there's a difference. He knew the kinda trouble we'd run into out there."

"What does that mean?"

"Think about it Kyle. You're supposed to be the smart one. Now, that it?"

"Yeah..."

"Get out of my face then. I've got stuff to do."

xxx

When Ash tracked Denny down at work she wasn't alone. Andy was with her. It made Ash angry to see them together like that, he didn't want Andy occupying this place in her life. Ash shot him a warning look.

"I'll leave you guys to it," Andy said warily, slinking off like the dog he was.

"Ash," she said tightly, her tone reflecting his own feelings.

"What are you doing?

"Working."

"You know what I mean."

"Oh you mean Andy? I'm not sure that's any of your business."

"You made it my business when you called me that night." Ash regretted his words instantly, throwing that back in her face was a low thing to do and he never wanted her to think she couldn't come to him. But it was too late for apologies, judging by the look on her face.

"You're doing exactly what Kyle did to you!" Denny accused.

"Difference is I didn't try to rape you," he argued back.

"Oh my God Ash! How many times do I have to tell you he didn't try to rape me! I started it."

"You were vulnerable," he tried to reason. "It shows a lack of respect. He knew you were still grieving and he knew you were drunk. That's how these things start."

"You don't get to tell me what to do. It's my life."

"He's is a bad guy Denny. Why can't you see that?"

"He's changed and we are just friends anyway. Why can't _you_ see that? You're blinded by what happened with your sister, but that's not me. You're using me to fix your mistakes with her and I'm sick of it!" That was all she thought of him? What could he say to that? He couldn't think of anything, he was too stunned to respond. She didn't know anything about Billie. About the beautiful, carefree girl she'd been before she'd let Dean drag her down. About how Dean had just needed a 'second chance' and about how he would 'change'. About how he'd ruined both their lives.

Ash took half a step towards her.

"Don't," she said, brushing a tear away, he hated that he'd made her cry. "Just leave me alone." So he did.

xxx

_He didn't want _you _going... He knew the trouble we'd run into..._ What was Brax implying? That Ash had left him behind to protect him? But if that was true... _You might wanna take the time to see what's staring you in the face..._ Denny had said to him once when he'd try to warn her about Ash. She'd been right, Ash didn't even like girls, and didn't that make Kyle a complete idiot? That night they'd sat around drinking, Ash had been reluctant to talk about his feelings but that could've been because he was gay, or just because he was a bloke... _Stay?_ Hadn't that been a perfect chance for Ash to confess his feelings if he had any? Brax must have his wires crossed, Ash couldn't be interested in _him_...

Kyle was pulled from his thoughts by the object of them. He was almost knocked over by an agitated Ash. He stopped abruptly and gave Kyle a look like he held all the answers. Kyle was sure that he didn't but he wanted to do whatever he could to help.

xxx

Was she right? What if this wasn't about Andy? Did it matter? Ash couldn't let it happen again. As he rounded the corner of the surf club he almost ran into Kyle. Kyle who had a habit of being there when he was needed.

Kyle reached out and steadied him.

"Ash? What is it? What's wrong?"

"Why can't she understand?" he pleaded, "I'm only trying to help."

"Who? Denny?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"She was with _him_."

"Ash, there's something you should know about Andy..."

"I don't care! She's gonna get into trouble with him!"

"Okay," Kyle said calmly in an attempt to soothe him, "but sometimes people have to make their own mistakes."

"Do they?" Ash bit back. "I should be a fucking expert at that by now then. My entire life is one big fuck up!" He threw his hands in the air at a complete fucking loss. He'd screwed things up with Billie, and hadn't even been able to find her to make things right. He'd ended up in prison, partially for a crime he didn't even commit, making him a screw-up even as a screw-up. He'd caused tension in Brax and Ricky's relationship, when Brax had done nothing but help him. And now he'd ruined things with Denny. He was bad news. Things would inevitably go wrong between him and Kyle as well.

"That's not tru-" Ash was done with talking, so he silenced Kyle with a kiss. There was a second, just one second, where everything was good, where he let himself believe he could have this, and then Kyle was pushing him away. But then, he'd expected that.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Kyle exclaimed, understandably shocked.

"Fucking up the last good thing I had." Ash turned and high tailed it. He'd burned his last bridge, so he better get the fuck outta town before the rain set in.


	12. Chapter 12

Ash had no one left to turn to, he'd made sure of that. He stuffed his few belongings into a bag. He did it in the lounge room because that's where he fucking lived, on a couch. He didn't know where he'd go. Somewhere, anywhere, it didn't matter. He'd caused more than enough trouble here.

"I saw that little exchange between you and Kyle earlier. Sucks when you can't have the one you want huh?" Great. Just fucking great. He so didn't need Andy hassling him right now.

"Piss off Barrett, I'm not in the mood." It was in that moment that Ash proved to himself how much he thought of Denny. Her aside, he would've flattened Andy without a word. The thought of her took some of the wind out of his sails, he couldn't walk away and leave things like they were between them. She was his friend.

"I didn't mean it like that you cranky bastard," Andy insisted, apparently unable to take a hint. He took a step closer and fixed Ash with a serious look. "I honestly never meant to hurt her. That night, I guess I just wasn't thinking."

"No, you weren't. That it?"

"Well seeing how we're talking, I'm gonna give you some advice-"

"Because I need you to tell me how to live my life..."

"Yeah, apparently you do. Stop pushing Denny away. She thinks the world of you but you'll lose her if you can't let go of the past. And as for Kyle-"

"You can stop right there. I definitely don't need your advice where he's concerned. Now get lost before I decide I really don't give a shit what Denny thinks anymore. "

"Fine. But just remember, Kyle's a good bloke. He'll forgive you if you let him." With those words Andy left him to it. And fuck it, just because Andy was a jerk it didn't mean he wasn't right. Ash couldn't just cut and run. But he couldn't stay here either. So the question was, where did he go now?

xxx

"Going somewhere?" Brax asked, appearing in the door of the flat.

"I reckon we all need some space mate," Ash said without looking up or stopping. He didn't wanna face Brax after having just molested his brother.

"Oi! Wait up!" Brax called after him. Ash didn't stop. "What's the hurry?" Brax said, catching up with him.

"Ask your brother."

"I'm asking you," Brax said, clamping a vicelike hand around his arm, forcing him to stop. A moment passed between them, one in which they both recognised that the other was a dangerous man, and for a second Ash wondered if he could beat Brax in a fight. Brax appeared to push a similar thought away as he forced himself to let go. He watched Ash expectantly.

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"You think I do? He's my brother and you're my best mate." Ash just glared at him. "Fine," Brax conceded, letting it drop. "Where are you gonna go?"

xxx

Ash knocked on the door. It opened to reveal an old bloke in a checked shirt that he recognised as Denny's boss.

"What can I do for you young fella?" he asked, looking Ash up and down suspiciously. Did he have 'ex-con' stamped across his forehead? Or was it just the leather that put people on edge? Maybe it was the long hair...

"I'm a friend of Denny's," he ventured, hoping her name would make her boss think better of him.

"I know who you are," he said, and Ash got the distinct impression he also knew that he'd made Denny cry. "What do you want?"

"Umm, I was hoping for a van?"

"For how long?"

"I dunno," he answered because he didn't, "a couple of weeks to start I guess."

"Denise wasn't very happy earlier," the bloke pointed out.

"Dad!" admonished a female voice from inside the house. The lady appeared beside her father, a short brunette who at least looked like she didn't want to skin him alive. "You said you wanted a van?"

"Yeah, please..." He skirted around the old bloke when she invited him inside to fill in the paperwork. She introduced herself as Roo Stewart and her father as Alf. She went through the particulars, only half of which Ash heard. He couldn't concentrate with Mr Stewart glaring daggers through him. She handed him the key with a polite smile. He thanked her. He started to walk out but he couldn't leave this hostility hanging between himself and his new landlord. He turned back to Mr Stewart.

"I didn't mean to upset Denny, I'll find a way to make it right."

"You flamin' well better," Mr Stewart scowled. Ash nodded and headed for his van.

xxx

When Ash was settled in, which consisted of chucking his bag on the bed and rifling through the cupboards to see what was there, he dragged a chair over from the barbeque area and set up camp in front of his van. As night fell, he lit a cigarette and leaned back to enjoy it.

"That's a terrible habit," a pommy accent interrupted and he looked up to see the doctor watching him disapprovingly. Well, he would know.

"We can't all be perfect model citizens like you." Ash blew a smoke ring, just to prove just how much practice he'd had.

The doctor frowned.

"Coping mechanism is it?"

"No. I just like it, makes me look cool..." Ash drew in another lungful of soothing poison.

Uninvited the doctor pulled up a stump.

"I'm Nate," he said, extending his hand. "I don't think we've met properly."

"Ash," he said, sitting up straight and shaking the offered hand. The doctor had a handshake that matched his biceps.

"Just moved in?"

"Yep." Ash noticed the motorcycle parked by the doc's van. "Nice bike," he commented.

"It goes alright. You ride?"

"I used to. It's not an activity they offer in lock up."

"You should take it for a spin some time."

"Maybe I will. You want a beer?" Ash asked, offering the doctor a bottle.

"Thanks," he accepted. "The Aussie's did alright today, Warner got one forty-five."

"How'd Clarke go?"

"Retired injured for sixty." This was actually kind of alright, just relaxing and having a yarn with someone he hadn't upset and wasn't likely to. They talked about cricket and rugby, the doctor filling in some gaps for Ash that he'd missed whilst inside, and for just a little while Ash forgot.


	13. Chapter 13

Amongst all the turmoil of yesterday Ash had forgotten one obvious fact. He worked at Angelo's. And because Kyle practically lived there they were going to run into each other sooner rather than later. That was especially true because he had to work today. He thought about not going but the thing about caravans was that they didn't pay for themselves and he wasn't gonna touch that other money. Besides, avoidance wasn't really his thing. With that in mind he headed off to work early instead.

xxx

When Kyle showed up for work, Ash was waiting outside. He didn't know what to say, he'd never been kissed by a bloke before.

"Look," Ash said without preamble, "I'm sorry about yesterday. I know it's my issue, not yours."

"What? Being gay?" Kyle asked as he unlocked the door. "It kinda is mine when you kiss me."

"No, I mean my feelings for you." That made him look up.

"You have feelings for me?" That made this so much worse. Ash gave him a dubious look.

"I thought that was pretty obvious," he frowned. "What? You think I go around kissing randoms all the time?"

"No, I mean I just thought it was because you were upset."

"It doesn't matter anyway," Ash dismissed, "I'll get over them. You have my word it won't happen again." Kyle wasn't sure how he felt about that. Obviously he couldn't have Ash kissing him, but he didn't like the thought of Ash not having who he wanted either. That just seemed too unfair after everything he'd been through.

xxx

Things got kind of back to normal after that. Ash and Denny still weren't talking, but at least they weren't yelling either. He missed her but he didn't want to risk another blow up between them so he was giving her some space. He didn't have any more thoughts about attacking Brax which was a good thing. At work things with Kyle were pretty much how they had been, except Ash was aware of where Kyle was every second of the day and sometimes he felt Kyle watching him, probably wondering if Ash was gonna have another meltdown and assault him again. They didn't talk about personal stuff anymore but it was friendly enough between them.

One good thing about living at the caravan park was Nate. Ash had been careful to keep the conversation light between them. They talked about bloke stuff, like cars and sport, and any arguments they had revolved around whether Holden or Ford was better and just whether or not South Sydney could back up and win the premiership again.

"You and Nate seem friendly," Kyle remarked a few days later. Nate dropped by Angelo's for a feed sometimes and Ash usually took the chance to stir him up about whatever their latest sporting rivalry was.

"He's my new neighbour," Ash said distractedly as he pulled the ringing phone from his pocket. It was a caller he wasn't expecting. "I have to take this," he told Kyle before heading quickly out the door.

Ash hit answer on the way outside.

"Ash," came Denny's voice, "can we talk?"

"Sure."

"Can you meet me at the cemetery?"

"Now?"

"Yeah."

"Um, okay. You alright?"

"Yeah, we just need to talk." She gave him directions, he didn't need them though.

He met her at the front gate. She was surprised when he knew the way to Casey's grave.

"You've been here before," she stated.

"Brax brought me once. I think he needed someone it wasn't personal for."

They stopped at the foot of the grave staring down at the simple head stone. Casey'd been so young. Around the same age as Ash when his life had been stolen too. The difference was Ash had a second chance.

"Ash," she said, turning to him with an anxious look. "I wanted to say sorry. I never should have said those things to you. I never even asked you how you got on looking for Billie..."

"Don't worry about it Den, we both said some stuff we probably shouldn't have. I only want what's best for you."

"And Billie?"

"She wasn't there." Denny gave him a sympathetic look and sat down on the grass at the foot of the grave. Ash sat down beside her. She plucked at the grass as she spoke.

"In a way, I feel like I'm doing what Case would want when I'm with Andy. He believed in giving people another chance."

"You don't like him as more than a friend then." She bit her lip and looked up at him.

"No," she admitted, "I'm scared that I do. I think that's why I got so angry with you. How messed up is that?"

"Why hang around him then? If you aren't ready?"

"I'm trying to find a reason not to but he hasn't set a foot wrong since that night." She reached out and took a handful of dirt from Casey's grave, letting it fall though her fingers. "I loved him so much, it consumed me completely, it was like nothing I've ever known. I know I'll never have that again but that doesn't mean I can't still be happy again one day... What about you and Kyle?" she asked looking up at him.

"I don't know," Ash admitted. "I kissed him, I shouldn't have..." Her eyes grew wide.

"What happened? What'd he do?"

"I dunno, I took off. He doesn't hate me but it's weird between us now, I think I ruined it. And we were just starting to get somewhere. You should've seen him the night we got home from looking for Billie..."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" There wasn't, but it made him feel better that she'd asked. He shook his head. "What a hopeless pair we are," she said, attempting a smile as she wiped her teary eyes.

"You're telling me chickie," he said, wrapping an arm around her. Love was strange.

xxx

Ash was pretty late when he got back to Angelo's.

"Where have you been?" Kyle barked. "You just skipped out on your shift!"

"Denny needed me."

"_I_ needed you. It's been hectic in here today." That pulled Ash up. The words bounced around in his head. _I needed you..._ Na, this wasn't gonna work. He needed space to get over Kyle.

"You're right. It's not working out, is it?"

"What? I didn't mean it like that."

"Na, it's better this way. I quit. You don't have to worry about me anymore."


	14. Chapter 14

Ash up and quitting was the last thing Kyle wanted. He pulled his phone from his pocket. Lately he and Ash didn't seem to be on the same page at all but maybe Brax could get through to him.

"Kyle."

"Brax, Ash quit."

"What? When?"

"Just now. I don't know what to do."

"Where is he now?"

"I dunno," Kyle said frustratedly, "he ran off."

"Okay, don't panic, I'll sort him out."

"Thanks Brax."

"Hey Kyle?"

"Yeah?"

"What's this really about? What happened between you two?"

Kyle sighed.

"He kissed me."

"And what'd you do?"

"I pushed him away, I just wasn't expecting it. He was upset and it kinda came out of the blue."

"And what do you think about it now?"

"I dunno. I hate that he's unhappy..."

"Right. Well thanks for the heads up. I'll see if I can knock some sense into him."

"Thank you."

"Okay, bye." The line went dead. Hopefully Brax could do what Kyle couldn't.

xxx

Ash was drinking a beer down on the beach when Brax came looking for him.

"It sounds better at night don't ya reckon? When you can't really see the water..." He parked himself on the sand beside Ash.

"Never really thought about it," Ash pouted.

"So I asked my brother like you said..." Brax told him.

"Oh yeah," Ash scoffed, "what'd he say? I 'spose this is the part where you belt the crap outta me."

"I don't get it Ash. What are you doing?" Brax said. Ash turned an impatient look on him. "Why didn't you just talk to him?" Brax asked.

"I don't know," Ash huffed, "I have no fucking idea _what_ I'm supposed to be doing..."

"Whatever you want. It's your life, just live it. Stop thinking about what everyone else needs." They lapsed into silence as Ash pondered that. Wasn't that what he'd done by quitting? Space from Kyle was what he needed...

"I didn't expect to fall in love when I came here," Ash said. "In fact, I never thought it would happen..."

"I'm not the one you should be telling mate."

"What if he doesn't feel the same? What if he can't?"

"Either way, that's up to him to say don't you think?" Brax was probably right. What good was a second chance if you didn't use it? "He's still at the restaurant. Get up there and sort this out. You never know mate, he might just surprise you."

xxx

When Ash walked back into the restaurant Kyle was still working. It was nice to know some things never changed.

Kyle looked up from the glasses he was stacking behind the bar. He watched Ash warily for a moment.

"Brax said-"

"Did Brax-"

They both spoke at once.

"You go first," Kyle said.

"Okay. Brax said we should talk. I think he's right."

"Of course he is, he's always right." Kyle came around the bar and leaned against it, crossing his arms over his chest.

Ash didn't know what to say. Kyle glared at him. He decided to start by apologising for acting like a jerk earlier.

"I'm sorry I let you down today and I'm sorry I quit like that."

"Good," Kyle shot back, "because it felt like shit." His reaction took Ash by surprise. The heat in his voice, and the pain in his eyes, it was the first time he'd seen Kyle's careful control slip. Sure, he'd been angry earlier but this was something else. "Between you moving out, Nate, and now this, I feel like I'm losing you."

"I'm sorry for all of that."

"Don't apologise, just fix it."

"How?"

Kyle sighed and walked out onto the balcony. Ash followed.

There was a bit of a breeze blowing but it wasn't cold. As he watched Kyle gaze out at the night he knew he needed to say something but he couldn't think what.

Kyle turned to him.

"Did you at least sort things out with Denny?"

"Yeah, she's confused though, about Andy..." A random memory of Kyle mentioning Andy popped into Ash's head. _There's something you should know about Andy..._ "You were trying to tell me something about him that day. What was it?"

"He's not the person you think he is. After Case died, the bloke that shot him, he ended up on life support. Brax wanted him dead, he wanted the doctors to just let him die. Obviously they couldn't do that. But Andy fixed it, he pulled the plug."

"Really?" Ash was shocked. He hadn't understood the depth of Andy's connection to the family until that moment.

"Yes. For Brax. And for Denny. Not that she knows that, so keep it between the four of us yeah?" Ash nodded, he would. It was important to him that Kyle had trusted him with this. "He risked his freedom to give us that peace of mind. I guess you never know what people are thinking or what they're really capable of..."

"Unless you ask them," Ash realised.

"If they even know themselves..." Kyle said, gazing out into the night once more.

"Do you know?" Ash said suddenly, taking a step closer. He'd kept his distance until now. _I feel like I'm losing you... _Ash knew what he needed to do. He reached up and touched his fingers softly to Kyle's cheek, turning his face towards him to search those deep brown eyes. Kyle looked back at him with uncertainty but he didn't pull away. Ash found that words came more easily as the space between them lessened. "Do you know how I fix this? I never want you to feel like this again. I want you to be happy, you deserve that. We've both had enough pain and uncertainty in our lives."

"Ash..." Kyle whispered, his voice thick with emotion.

"I know what I want to do," he said quietly, "but I gave you my word I wouldn't..."

Kyle considered that for a moment before a shining light filled his eyes. He brought his hand up to rest on Ash's face. The deliberate and intimate gesture filled Ash with hope.

"What if I kissed you first? Would that make it okay?"

"Yeah," Ash smiled, "I reckon that'd do it."

**AN: So that's it for this story. Hope everyone enjoyed it. Thanks for reading and especially to those who reviewed. And a big thank you to FrankElza for your help and support :)**


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